Question: I want to die because I am tired of living in this world, but I am scared I haven’t done enough to be ready to die. But I don’t like living in this dunya anymore and I want to leave. Is this good or bad?
I don’t know. Try it and tell me (Hoja laughs). It’s a very interesting question. Tauba Astarghfirullah. You are tired of being in this world? I just said, didn’t I? Before this what was it that we said? Complaining: I complain because I have no shoes. I complain because I have shoes. Until I saw a man who has no feet. Then he stops complaining.
Why you want to die? You want to die to run away from the problems of this world? Who has bigger problems in this world? Who has the most problem in this world? The Prophets had the most problem in this world. They are carrying the burden of the problems of their whole ummat of their nation. They never said they want to die. None of them ever committed suicide. One Prophet I know, he got so tired that he ran away and he was punished. Astarghfirullah, we cannot say much for him. He was punished. Yunus (as) He escaped and he was swallowed by the whale. Forty days and forty nights he spent in the belly of the whale and he is making the zikr of, ‘La ilaha illa anta, Subhanaka, Inni kuntu minaz-zalimin . La illaha illa anta – there’s no illah, there’s no god except for You. Glory be to You. And I’m the one who has oppressed myself.’ Because you are running away from responsibility. Oh, so easy for you to say, ‘but I’m not a Prophet. Prophet can carry this.’ Other than the Prophets, the Awliya Allah, the friends of Allah, they have the most problem in this world. So who is your role model now? Who is it that you want to follow? You want to follow people who are not following the way of Haqq, and to say, when problems come to them that you want to die, to go?
Why are you tired of being in this world? What is the reason? So many they are tired from this world because they don’t get what they want. “ I want something. I can’t get it. So, I’m fed up. Now I want to die.’ Understand this, our Sheykh has said so many times: The way that you live, that’s how you are going to die. The way that you die, that’s how that you are going to be raised on Judgement Day. So if you live your days complaining and being tired, that’s going to be very bad news for anyone. Because Allah swt, which of the favours of your Lord can you deny? When you are sick, what do you do? When people they are sick, do they say, ‘I’m fed up being sick, I want to die’? Very rarely I’ve heard people say that. Everyone who is sick they want to get cured right? You think there’s something sick in you, it’s not thinking, definitely. If you don’t have hope and you are not thinking straight, seek a cure. Be around those ones who have some answers. They may not have all the answers. But Allah is saying, ‘if you have questions, be with the ahle Zikr.’ Be with them. Be with those ones who remember Allah. They have the answers.
If a man by himself, just by himself, pulling himself out, he can have everything in this world but when his heart is not satisfied, and your heart can only be satisfied, Ala Bizikrillahi Tatmainnal Qulub – Only in the remembrance of Allah can the heart be satisfied. That if he’s not remembering Allah, he’s not around the friends of Allah, he’s not around the man of Allah, he can have everything, his heart is not satisfied, he will put himself into a hell.
You must ask yourself: why you want to die? Why you are being tired from this world? Are those reasons legitimate or not. You don’t like to live anymore and you want to leave, what is the reason for that? If you say, because it is for your nafs because your nafs is saying it. Then we say it’s not a good reason, you are going to follow your nafs and your nafs will lead you to the fire. If you ask the friends of Allah and they are telling you, first wake up and understand who you are, what are you living for? What is your reason of creation and are you fulfilling it? If you are running to be busy with that, following them, they will lead you to good places. Don’t worry. They will lead you to safety.
So, don’t have this kind of thinking. It is not good. Make more Syukur Alhamdulillah. Count the blessings of your Lord. And there are untold blessings that Allah is giving us right now. Alhamdulillah, we are able to breath in and out. Do you know how many people there are right now that they cannot breath in, that it’s like breathing fire. They cannot breath out and it’s killing them. Simple ni’mat, favour of Allah. How much should we thank Allah for the value of one eye? How much we should give thanks to Allah that He is still giving us a roof over our head, especially if we are living here in America. So if a man is not concentrating on giving Syukur, giving thanks, he will be busy with complaining.
If you have some problems, go to find the answers. And the answer is not to say, ‘I want to give up.’ That is not the answer. Death is just a beginning. A beginning of either a good journey or not so good journey. So prepare for that. SelamAleykum.
WaminaAllahu Taufiq Al-Fatiha.
Hoja Lokman Efendi Hz, Khalifah of Shaykh Abdulkerim el Kibrisi (qs) * OSMANLI DERGAHI- New York
27 Jamadilakhir 1436H
April 17, 2015