Question: For the past couple weeks, I am feeling nauseous while participating in Zikr at Dergah. What am I doing wrong?
BismillahirRahmanirRahim. Good, you need to check yourself. You’re definitely doing something wrong. Check yourself. The one who is always checking himself, he is not going to say, ‘what am I doing wrong?’ He will understand, ‘what is it that I am doing right? What am I doing right? Am I doing my prayers correctly? No. Am I doing my zikr correctly? No. Am I doing the work that is given to me correctly? No.’
So now you have a million reasons. Choose which one. Make tauba from that. Change. Ask for forgiveness. Don’t be arrogant and stubborn. Arrogant and stubbornness comes in hundreds and thousands of ways, of tricks. Maybe the voice is so nice, the voice is so humble, but there’s stubbornness behind that. The way the person stands and speaks, as if butter is not going to melt in his mouth. You know that expression? Sometimes I use this expression and people say, I don’t understand what you are speaking? What do you mean, butter is not going to melt in your mouth? Means a person is cold?
It means a person is so innocent. It’s not going to cause any damage to nothing. But behind that is huge ego, stubbornness. Now the doctor will know, the doctor will know whether you are hiding something or not. When you are sitting in a group of people, when you go to supermarket, when you go outside, when you are talking to your family, everyone looks okay. Everyone here looks healthy, everyone looks nice. Nice clothes, nice perfume. But if everyone checks in with the doctor, the doctor can tell you exactly what everyone has, physically. Everyone’s sickness. Can you say that? Can you tell that? No, you cannot. But the doctor can. No matter how much you try to hide yourself by wearing nice clothes and better perfume, the doctor says, ‘come.’ Some doctor, they need to look in your eyes, they already know. Some doctors they look in your hands, they know. Some doctors, they don’t have to look at you, they know.
So, find out. Fix it. You do something wrong, you run to do something right. Yeah, definitely. The zikr is supposed to give you energy. Zikr is supposed to give you a life. But, never blame that the zikr is making you to feel this way. Sometimes the medicine, so many times the medicine is going to make you feel worse before it makes you feel better. Isn’t it? So that is what it is. SelamAleykum warahmatullahi wabarakatu.
Sheykh Lokman Efendi Hz,
Khalifah of SahibulSaif Shaykh Abdulkerim el Kibrisi (qs),
OSMANLI DERGAHI- New York
22 Shawwal 1436H
7 August, 2015