I used to be passionate about fixing myself. What can I do to regain that passion?

BismillahirRahmanirRahim

Question: I used to be passionate about fixing myself. But I have stopped doing so and now everything is so difficult to learn. What can I do to regain that passion?

Hoja Effendi

When you first fall in love, say when you first get married, Islamically you get married first, when you fall in love, passion isn’t it? Then later, did that passion stay? No. it’s going to pass. But the passion is not disappearing, it’s transforming, it’s becoming something else. It cannot just be passion. Because the passion by itself also is a very  low level station. It’s just about you feeling good. Just about you feeling good. It’s not really about the work too. It’s not about others, it’s about you feeling good. Understand?

So it’s still very low level. It is still about you. It is not about the one that you are serving. So it is natural now that in the beginning you have the passion, later that passion must change. Passion changes into what? Love. The passion it changes into what? Into hizmet, into service. It changes into you stop pleasing yourself, it’s about pleasing the beloved one. Now when you start pleasing that one, you are just going to concentrate on that one, you are going to be very careful and you are careful about doing the work. It doesn’t matter then that one is going to give you a rose or a thorn of a rose. Both coming from him. So now you concentrate on that, the passion becomes service. Service, some EvliyaAllah is saying: hizmet is higher than ibadat. Because the ibadat is about again, you. But now when you serve, it’s not about you, it’s about someone else.

We are saying we are serving Allah, what can we do to serve Allah? Allah needs our service? Hasha. Allah does not need nothing. So how can you serve that one who doesn’t need anything from you? You cannot. So who is serving who? Allah is not in need. We are in need, always. Who is serving us? Who is making us to have what we need? Who is giving? Who is the most Generous? Allah. So now, don’t try to regain that passion. Concentrate on the work and doing that work well. That passion may come. Passion comes and goes. They may test you. They may say, well now you are running because you have the passion, what if we take away the passion? Are you still going to run?

So many people they are stuck at that level now. Tarikat too. First they are running, running, running. Then later when we say, ok now the real training starts, we are not going to praise you so much. We are not going to boost you so much, now we are going to start cleaning you up a little bit, now we are going to see what you are made of. We already know what you are made of, now you are going to see what you are made of. Now we are going to see what we are made of. We are going to see what are our strengths and what are our weaknesses. What are our illusions and our delusions.

Keep serving, later that may come. And when that comes, it is beyond passion now. Now, that one becomes, you are doing it willingly. Willingly, voluntarily, not because they are going to give you something in return, they are going to give you a good feeling in return, No. Willingly. Then once you are there, be happy because Allah is saying, ‘and when My servant does voluntary action, worship to Me,  I will be his eyes that he sees with, his ears that he hears with, his tongue that he speaks, his hands that he touches, his feet that he walks.’ That is the only time. Before that, it’s obligation.

Servant becomes beloved to Allah because he fulfills his obligations. But when he does it voluntarily, when there is no obligations, when there is no business transactions: I do this I’m going to get this, I do this worship I’m going to get so much sawab. It’s not about that anymore. It’s about you voluntarily, willingly, doing it. Regardless. Then that’s the time you are on the way of becoming a servant of Allah swt. Before that you are not a servant to Allah. You are partner. You are a shirk to Allah. You are a business partner. You know, business is also called what? Syarikat. Because you say, ‘I do this, you give me this. I do this much, you give me this.’ You understand? Now beyond that, you say, ‘I’m not interested, I’m not making partnership with You. We are not business partners.’  Like one day, Nasiruddin Hoja, he’s planting wheats but his wheats did not come out very good every year. So one year, he said, ‘alright now,  Ya Rabbi, this year I’m going to make You to be my business partner in planting the wheats. I’m going to plant the wheats and whatever that comes out from the harvest, you are going to divide it fifty-fifty. Fifty You take, Allah You take, and fifty it belongs to me. Alright? Alright.’

So he planted. And that year, so much wheats came. Of course, you have the best partner: Allah. So the wheat came. And he harvested. He’s putting one pile like this, and another pile like that, dividing it into two separate piles, equal. So now, Nasiruddin Hoja, sitting there looking at piles and saying, hmm, mashaAllah, thank You Ya Rabbi. You are a very good business partner. Hmm, my pile is here, this is Your pile, but what are you going to do with so much anyway. You are Allah, You don’t need so much wheats. So let must just take a little it. I’m going to put it over here, because I’m in need. You are not  in need. Alhamdulillah. Then after a while, he’s thinking, well you don’t need this much too, let me also take a little bit more. And later he saw that and he says, you know what? Let me take…, before he could finish it, suddenly big clouds started entering. Big thunderstorm entering, and the win started blowing and the win blew and the thunderstorm, the typhoon came and sucked out all his wheats now. And then the thunder came down. Lightning came down. So Hoja is saying, ‘okay okay, that’s enough already. You took everything, you don’t have to put the flashlight to check, to see whether there’s anything left or not.’

Huh! People, they are not even that generous to their Lord. May Allah make us to become sincere in our service. He is the most Generous, He gives. WaminAllahu taufiq, Al-Fatiha.

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 Sheykh Lokman Efendi Hz,
Khalifah of SahibulSaif Shaykh Abdulkerim el Kibrisi (qs),
OSMANLI DERGAHI- New York
11 Zul-Hijja, 1436H
September 24, 2015

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