Question: How do you put discipline in your life without becoming a tyrant in your daily life?
First put it in you. You are asking a question, how do we put the discipline for example, or the way of life, when you are at home with your children, with other people, so that you are balance and you don’t become a tyrant. First, put it on you. You have that lifestyle. If you are having that lifestyle, you are strict on yourself, and you know how hot the fire is, you know what kind of pain it’s giving you, then that time you’ll know how to balance, giving out to other people. You will know. ‘That one is a little kid, I’m learning this, I cannot give it to them like that because I know if I give, it is going to crush the little kid. I need to balance it a little bit but I have to have an end goal in mind.’ ‘This other one has just come, I cannot show everything.’ ‘This other one, although he is sitting for every sohbet and listening, but something is not zonking in. So, I leave it there.’
We should be busy with us, with ourselves. Believe me, it will get easier. You will find your answer easier. I’m looking so many of you, you are not putting simple thing into your daily lifestyle. Everyone now sitting for example, eating with your right hand. But how many of you eating with your left hand when we are not around? We are sitting down and eating because the Prophet (asws) is forbidding us to be standing up, walking around when you are eating. But how many of you, you don’t care, you eat and you drink standing up, making it into a habit. You forget, once in a while, something else. You are trying, it’s something else. But, if you are not putting those simple thing and recircuiting, rewiring your responses, then it’s very difficult to show others. Then your words that time is not going to make a difference.
The one who tells you honey is sweet, it’s different from the one who has studied honey all his life but he has never tasted anything, from the one who has tasted honey. Because he speaks from his own experience. That one is just speaking from knowledge, book knowledge. He has not experience. Because once you start experiencing, you know how to balance it, and that becomes knowledge. You understand? Insya’Allah. WaminAllahu Taufiq, al-Fatiha.
Sheykh Lokman Efendi Hz,
Khalifah of SahibulSaif Shaykh Abdulkerim el Kibrisi (qs),
OSMANLI DERGAHI- New York
25 Ramazan 1437
June 30, 2016.