How do we know when our crying is real or not?


Question: When the Prophet (AS) is saying, ‘Make yourself to cry’ how do we know when our crying is real or not?

hoja effendi (2).jpg

You don’t know when you are pretending, you don’t know when you are sincerely crying. You should know. The crying, it is because of something. Crying because of something. The hadiths, the Holy Prophet (asws) is saying, ‘If you know what I know, you are going to cry a lot and you are going to laugh little.’

Now, some people they take that to mean they’re always going to be very solemn, very sour. It’s not meaning that too. Because so many people they laugh with ghaflat, with emptiness, they laugh and that laughter brings them away from iman. There is a laughter that brings you to faith too. There is a kind of laughter that brings you to faith, to understanding Allah and his Prophet more, to increase your faith. And there is a laughter that brings you out from the faith.

Today’s humor, ninety-nine percent, it is to make you forget about Allah. Nasruddin Hoja, his stories always makes people to laugh, even if they’ve heard it before they want to hear it again, they want to say it again. Every time when that is being told, they smile and they laugh, yes, they laugh. But is that laughter bringing you away from Allah? No, that laughter brings you closer to Allah (SWT), because his stories, there is always wisdom, and there is always, so many times he is showing the heedlessness of man, and the mercy of Allah. So many times he’s using himself as an example, if it is not himself, it is his donkey. Yeah?

So now, knowing what you know, that is going to make you to cry. Why are you crying? Today’s people they only cry because they don’t get what they want. And ninety-nine percent, it is because of dunya, they cry. So many times I hear people, they are texting me, crying so much because of dunya, but once you say, ‘as Sheykh Effendi likes, if Allah gives the permission it will happen.’ Once it happens, they forget you. Just like that. Some they never even say thank you. It’s common. ‘I’m so sick,’ okay, you get well, ‘oh, when did you get well?’ ‘Oh, two weeks ago.’ Alhamdulillah, I smile. This is man’s nature because man is what? Created in haste, and he is heedless, he is forgetful. Allah is describing. You understand? So the zikr is supposed to make you to think, to understand.

So what are you crying for? As a believer, what must you cry for? You’re crying for yourself and how disobedient you are, how far we are from Allah. Then you’re going to look at all the things that make you to become away from Allah, to make your heart to turn hard. It’s because of that. Because some people they also cry, but it’s crying with heedlessness too. Right? Because it feels good, it’s a high that gets you. You cry and you cry, you think you’re so close to Allah, but, how do you know you are sincere? Next minute, if someone touches your ego a little bit, you get upset. That’s not crying. Worse, if the Sheykh tells you, ‘you are being an idiot,’ bla..bla..bla..bla..bla, ‘Stop that.’ Bla..bla..bla..bla..bla..bla..bla, then what is all that crying for? Fake. It’s fake. It’s just another high. It’s just another kind of drug that you take and because you feel that you are close to Allah at that time, But there is no result that comes from that. There’s no result, it’s empty. You’re crying, and your heart has become really, eh, you know, you cry and your heart has become, like, lacerated. Like someone is just chopping it to pieces. That time somebody says and curse at you, you don’t have even any energy. And if you’re crying because you’re feeling very sorry because you are such a disobedient one, then if someone says, ‘Hey, donkey,’ in reality you’re going to start crying again and say, ‘yeah, that’s right, I am a donkey.’ Not to say, ‘why you say that I’m a donkey?’

These days when the Sheykh says, not donkey, saying, you know you’re doing this, like this, like this. ‘I don’t think you are right!’ That one is a real donkey. So watch yourself. This is the way that we have to become very aware of ourselves, because you may not be aware that whatever you’re doing, it is bringing you closer to Allah or it’s bringing you further away from Allah (SWT). You think you’re taking the medicine, but in reality the real doctor comes and says, ‘this medicine is no good for you. It’s actually making you sick. Who are you to prescribe medicine to yourself?’

So, and the Holy Prophet (asws) is saying, ‘cry.’ Cry for what? For that reason. Cry for ourselves. Cry for our ego, cry to say, ‘La illaha illa anta Subhana in kuntu mina zalimeen – I have become a tyrant to myself.’ Then you must know how a tyrant you are, inside, before that crying, and after that crying. Not to become a tyrant after that crying, in that crying you’re saying, ‘yeah I’m a tyrant, I’m so bad one,’ then after that, someone touches you, you become a tyrant again. Then what is all that crying for? It’s fake.

When the heart cries, it becomes so soft, that time it becomes really sensitive it knows everything is coming from Allah. Cry. And if you can’t cry, make yourself to cry. You cannot cry because we cry, again, when our nafs wants something it doesn’t get, you can cry. But you don’t cry for the spirit. Some people, they are asking me so many times, crying, saying, ‘my work is like this, my work is, ah, please, I need your guidance, please,’ crying for work, at the same time doing all sorts of wrong things. I say, ‘I never hear you one time telling me, ‘please help me; I’m doing all these wrong things.’ Why I have to hear from other people? Why I have to hear it from other people that you’re doing all these things? You know that. Why you didn’t come and say, ‘please, I need help from this.’?’ Crying for the dunya again. So, you don’t know how to cry. Now you are going to make yourself to cry. Hours, yes.

Taqlid. We have to follow, who are we following? The righteous ones. We are not following those ones who are fake, we’re following the right ones. We’re following the sincere ones. Follow them. Then, make yourself to cry. There is something wrong with your heart if you are not understanding the fire that is around you, the fire that is inside of you. There’s something wrong. When there is something wrong like that, you cannot cry, it is good. Now, in the way of Allah, that you push yourself, you force yourself a little bit. You’re fasting, now. Soon the time will come when you are going to fast. Is there any choice for us to fast? Today’s Muslims they are going to say everything is a choice. Unconditional love. There’s no condition now. Yes, there is a condition. Hazreti Jibrail (as) himself came. Hazreti Jibrail, in front of the Holy Prophet (asws), in front of the Sahabi-e-kiram, he was testing the Prophet. What Islam, what is iman and what is ihsan. These are the conditions of faith. These are the conditions of being a servant to Allah. These are the conditions to return to Allah, properly. It’s not unconditional. We become like Christians. Unconditional love. But you know what; Christians have a lot of conditions too. Now, wrong understanding.

We are here to understand properly insyaAllah. We’re taking it from our SheYkh. We’re putting it in our lives and we’re seeing it. If you like it, take it. SElam aleykum wa rahmatullah.


stock-vector-vector-vintage-borders-54193183 (2)Sheykh Lokman Efendi Hz  
Khalifah of SahibulSaif Shaykh Abdulkerim el Kibrisi (qs),
Osmanli Dergahi, New York
18 Rajab 1439
April 5, 2018stock-vector-vector-vintage-borders-54193183 (2)

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